Conditional love promises the child love, but dangles it before its eyes like the carrot and stick before a donkey until it meets the right ‘conditions’. Conditional love threatens with “the withdrawal of love when [the child] does not obey”, a powerful weapon in the hands of parents to make the child exhibit desired behavior.
“Never apologise for showing feeling, my friend. Remember that when you do so you apologise for truth.”—Benjamin Disraeli, Contarini Fleming
“We, at the height, are ready to decline.” — Shakespeare
“Experience is, for me, the highest authority. The touchstone of validity is my own experience. No other person’s ideas, and none of my own ideas, are as authoritative as my experience. It is to experience that I must return again and again, to discover a closer approximation to truth as it is in the process of becoming in me.”—Carl Rogers, On Becoming a Person